Not Just The Beer Gardens ...
Pubs could open sooner than July. Hotels and restaurants may follow. The chances of getting a haircut improved as the government lock down eases.
Now it's OK to see six members of a family in the garden, having a barbecue, drinking alcohol. Just don't drive 300 miles back home, if you are over the drink drive limit.
The nanny state thinks of everything. It will be OK to pass through the house, if the garden is at the back. It will be OK to return into the house, if you need to go to the toilet.
If you still have a toilet in the back garden, then so much the better. Just make sure to wash your hands and ensure all areas are thoroughly cleansed before leaving.This guidance applies to both the body and facilities apparently.
This new guidance applies from Monday. Please do not attempt to do this over the weekend. The police will act to deter grandchildren from seeing aged ones before 12:00am on the 1st June. Kids over the age of six, will be allowed to stay up late on Sunday night, as a special dispensation.
As suggested last week, social distancing guidelines may be ditched. The two meter will have to be modified if the leisure and entertainment business is to return to normality. Priti Patel will have to be quarantined of air-bridges are to be opened with Europe. The health secretary Matt Hancock said he was "a little more optimistic" about the chances of people going abroad for their summer holidays.
"Outdoors is safer than indoors" claimed Mr Hancock. He obviously hasn't driven around Richmond in a Range Rover wearing a Rolex. The R(0) must be higher indoors. Should we be sleeping outside? Follow scientific guidance and we may all end up sleeping on the streets, unless the economy is allowed to bounce back and soon.
Rushi Sunak continues to be the most popular member of cabinet but not for much longer. The furlough scheme is to be curtailed. The Chancellor is paying the wages of 10 million workers. The cost is greater than the health service. 8.5 million have signed up for the furlough scheme. 1.5 million are officially unemployed. Government borrowing will hit £300 billion this year. The furlough scheme will be trimmed in September and October. It will be knocked on the head in November.
It really is time to get back to work ...
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