Why Putting Yourself First Is Good For You (And Not At All Selfish!)
Your mind is already set up to take care of you first. If you are so busy you have no time for yourself, which of these needs are you getting met? It could be significance, as in “I’m important. Look how in-demand I am.”
Are you taking care of everyone else with no time left over for me-time? You could be getting your need for connection met, as well as the certainty that you matter. But let me assure you again: You. Matter.
The martyr thing is a biggie in our society of “please notice me.” It comes from not knowing who we are because we’re afraid of being seen as selfish, egotistical, or a narcissist if we take time for ourselves.
Here’s what that mindset does though: It makes it impossible to develop self-love, and that means our needs for connection, certainty, and significance can only come from others.
It puts us in a box of having to do, do, do for everyone else in order to get our basic psychological needs met — and that is dangerous. We certainly can never fulfill our dreams that way.
Your life is meaningful. Be selfish. Let’s change the way that word is used so the definition can finally be accurate and supportive.
Here are 5 (seemingly selfish, but actually smart) ways you can bring more happiness and meaning into your life: continue reading on the Positive Women Rock Blog.
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