Something interesting happened during my online book launch.
I found myself speaking much more intimately about myself than I had planned.
Although, if you attended either launch you’ll have heard me say that Nicole Mansour and I decided beforehand that we would not script our conversation at all.
We said we would give ourselves permission to exist and see where it went.
And that’s where it went...
To me sharing things I hadn’t planned to share.
I mean, it wasn’t BAD stuff, but it was honest and exposing...
And afterwards I had what Brene Brown calls ‘a vulnerability hangover’.
I woke the next morning and remembered it and thought, ‘Did I really say that?!’
And started to cringe...
But then I stopped myself.
Because all I did was be more intimate.
Which I’ve done in this new book anyway. In chapter 8 I’ve shared my story for goodness sake!
In chapter 13, How to love yourself in Intimacy and Trust, I define intimacy as,
"being close enough to someone that they can see your vulnerabilities, insecurities, and open heartedness."
Intimacy is sometimes scary, isn't it?
When I’m uncomfortable I practice what I preach and use the Love question.
So I did and my answer was, ‘If I loved myself I’d be fine with seeing myself and being seen. It’s just my Truth after all. This is me.”
I chose to open up into loving myself even more and it felt good. Exposed but ok.
I was with me, so it felt safe enough.
But it made me think, ‘Why did I feel safe enough to share so openly in the online space even though we were over 40 people in the group, some of whom I didn’t even know!’
I think it’s because I’ve become so used to my online groups being safe spaces for honest sharing and intimacy that I just felt safe to do so. If you've been in one of my courses you'll know what I'm talking about.
For example, in my practitioner’s courses, the sharing amongst us therapists, doctors, social workers and healers is real and vulnerable and we hold each other so acceptingly and caringly…
Real healing happens from that kind of intimacy with ourselves and the others… when we feel that kind of permission to exist...
And it’s become normal for me.
How marvellous is that?
So even though it was a different group, their sharing was also immediately real and honest and I relaxed into the familiar feeling of a brave healing space.
And together we created a space for sharing with courage and love.
I’m so grateful to share such magical experiences with you. Thank you to those who were in that online launch.
If you loved yourself, how would you ALLOW some intimacy now?
CAPE TOWN PEOPLE:
We have another chance to play! Diarise it now.
I’m honoured to invite you to another in-person launch event at
Exclusive Books in Cavendish Square.
Tuesday 28th February at 6pm.
I’ll answer your questions, read sections from the book and take you through an If I Loved Myself process… Maybe I’ll even get intimate again… 😅
Put it in your calendar right now, invite all your friends and join!
