Hello again Friend
That's the magic question:
Can You Develop Self Confidence?
I bet you have those friends or family members that you envy that just seem to have natural confidence.
Maybe they're the life of the party, outgoing, always look fantastic, and come across super smooth in their delivery.
It can be easy for us to assume that people are born with this natural ability but the truth is that confidence is a skill that can be practiced over time.
I was always a shy little girl, literally hiding behind my mother’s skirt tails, was introverted, loved my own company, and always afraid to approach people.
Whenever we went to a family event, I would always let my sisters walk in first to break the ice then I would follow.
But what I’ve realized over time is that confidence comes with experience, practice, and posture and that you can actually control your confidence levels if you know-how.
You can become more confident by the way you speak, your delivery, and your body language, by sitting or standing up straight and speaking slowly, clearly, and powerfully.
Imagining you have something really really important to say and the people that are listening are really excited to hear it.
If you make that external change from how you would normally speak (if you are usually awkward and shy) you’ll be amazed at how confident you will suddenly feel by making those shifts and you’ll start to influence your internal state.
The external totally influences the internal. It's your behaviour first and your attitude second.
You see, people aren’t seeing you from the inside, they don’t see your internal state. All they see is your delivery and your posture no matter how scared you might actually be feeling inside.
Once you change your behaviour (which anyone can do) then you let the confidence follow.
Once you master this concept, then you can apply it to other things than just how you speak and carry yourself.
For example:
1) The way you dress.
How you look can really affect the way you feel, especially when you start receiving compliments from people around you.
I remember my mother always saying to me when I would dress to go out to a club as a teenager, "Lisa, you can be underdressed but you can never be overdressed."
2) What you choose to eat.
Making healthy choices can also affect the way you feel. When I use to attend Weight Watchers the motto was to always make "wise choices."
I was speaking to one of my clients Jen Albano the other day who helps busy business mums schedule a daily fitness routine. ( and she's amazing)
I said to her “I feel like I need to lose 30 kilos before I can even start dating again”
She told me If I start changing my daily routine and food choices, I would naturally start to feel more confident about myself, attract the right man and the weight loss will naturally follow.
And she's so right. It's all about those internal changes and how you feel about yourself that will reflect on the outside to others.
How would that make you think about yourself?
I know for me, not only would I feel better but act more confidently too. So what's stopping me?
Well, discipline and getting in the right frame of mind. Procrastination and doing it instead of thinking about it.
This is the problem with many of us in our businesses, thinking about the outcome more than taking action on the outcome.
3) How you introduce yourself.
I bet when somebody asks what you do, you automatically answer with something like "Oh, I'm a Life Coach"
But what about if you answered with something like "Oh, you know those coaches that help abused women recover from traumatic relationships and find the man of their dreams? That's me"
That is a total transformation, right?
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