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The Elliot Institute News
From the Leader in Post-Abortion Research
Vol. 9, No. 7 -- June 7, 2010
Visit Us Online: www.AfterAbortion.org
The UnChoice Campaign: TheUnChoice.com
Read Back Issues of This E-Newsletter
Special Edition on Men and Abortion
This month we celebrate Father's Day in the United States. On a day we celebrate, honor and remember our fathers, there will be many men who will be forgotten, overlooked or silently grieving: men who have been involved in or lost a child to abortion.
While researchers and mental health professionals are beginning to understand the many ways in which abortion exploits and harms women, the field of research and outreach to men hurt by abortion is only beginning to be explored. This special edition of the Elliot Institute News looks at some of the available research and offers insights from those who work with men and men who have been there. You'll also find an invitation at the end of this email to join in our Father's Day Outreach to men who are struggling after abortion.
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Forgotten Fathers and
Their Unforgettable Children
In the early 1970s, Arthur Shostak accompanied his partner to a well-groomed suburban abortion clinic. They had both agreed abortion was best. But sitting in the waiting room proved to be a "bruising experience." By the time he left the clinic, he was shocked by about how deeply disturbed he had become.
A professor of sociology at Drexel University in Philadelphia, Shostak spent the subsequent ten years studying the abortion experience of men. His study included a survey of 1,000 men who accompanied their wives or girlfriends to abortion clinics.
Shostak's study was published in a book, Men and Abortion: Lessons, Losses and Love, in 1984. The value of this study is limited to reporting mostly the short term reactions of men to the pregnancy and the decision to abort. In addition, because of the selection process, this study did not reflect the attitudes or experiences of men who did not accompany their partners to the abortion clinic--which could be because they were unaware of the pregnancy and abortion, because they were casual or unsupportive partners, or because they were opposed to the abortion. Despite these significant limitations, Shostak's study, using the largest group of men ever surveyed about their abortions, is still the benchmark study in this understudied field.
Shostak reported that the majority of the men surveyed in clinic waiting rooms felt isolated, angry at their partners or themselves, and were concerned about the physical and emotional damage abortion might cause their partner.
Read entire article
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Learn more: Read about the latest study on abortion's impact on men's relationships.
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The Impact of Abortion on Men
When people think about the role of men in abortion, it seems that they usually think about the stereotype of the man who forces the abortion or the male who abandons. However, there are many roles the man may have played in the experience. One man may have been involved in several abortions, each with a different scenario. The impact on fathers is mitigated by the role they play in the abortion. They fall into separate categories.
If you are a caregiver, you need to know that sometimes the man makes contact with a caregiver under the guise of seeking help for his partner or trying to understand what his partner is experiencing. If he is looking for materials about the aftermath of abortion, ask if this is for himself or for a partner. If it is for a partner, you can ask, "Are you the father?"
This is hard for him to discuss, but it is critical to acknowledge that men can struggle after an abortion loss. You can ask, "How can I be of help to you?" You may also be able to ask at some point if this is his first abortion experience. Listening to him can be an enormous gift.
A man can come to recognize that an abortion experience touched him in many different ways. Each man has his own unique story but there seem to be some common elements.
Read entire article
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Learn More: Visit our men and abortion page for articles, personal stories and links to resources.
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Post-Abortion Trauma in Men
Still Overlooked
Catherine Coyle, Ph.D.
[More than thirty] years have passed since the legalization of abortion in the United States. In those years, numerous studies have documented the potential negative effects of abortion on women. The effects of abortion on men however have been largely ignored by both the scientific community and American society.
The few published studies concerning men suggest that, like women, men may experience grief,1 anxiety, guilt, helplessness,2 and anger.3 The fact that men tend to repress their emotions may also make it more difficult for them to resolve their grief.4
Even men who support their partner's abortion may experience ambivalent feelings such as relief along with anxiety, anguish, grief, and guilt.5 About half of the men interviewed by these authors reported that one year after the abortion occurred, they still had frequent (monthly) thoughts about it.6
Read entire article
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Learn more: Visit the Thomas W. Strahan Memorial Library at www.abortionrisks.org for a bibliography of additional studies on men and abortion.
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"That Day Ripped My Gut Out"
One Man's Story of Abortion
For every woman who has had an abortion a man has been involved. For me it was two abortions.
I think that because we live in such a visual world where we can't see the baby from conception, it just doesn't seem real. I know this may seem like a simple analogy, but ... we cannot see corn that was just planted; yet, that doesn't make it any less a vegetable.
My story begins at 16 when I heard that first "I'm pregnant" from my girlfriend.
Read entire article
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Reprinted with permission from the Fatherhood Forever web site, www.fatherhoodforever.org.
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Additional Resources on
Abortion's Impact on Men
Free Resources
Additional articles and research on men and abortion
Father's Day ad/flyer
Healing Resources
Links to groups offering counseling and support after abortion
Join Our Father's Day Outreach
Be a part of our Father's Day Outreach by downloading and sharing our healing resources. Learn more
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Support Our Work
The Elliot Institute provides many free educational resources to individuals and groups. However, we need your help for this service to continue. Please consider supporting our work with a tax-deductible donation.
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