Why are the lessons we most need to learn always the hardest?

Such as…

Lesson #1: Thriving through change means proactively embracing it (not just accepting it).

When my son, Zachary, left for college last Fall I realized change can be actively shaped - at least partly - by you.

Acceptance is passive. But embracing is more intentional because it’s about leaning in with purpose to proactively help that change along.

Which yes, feels a bit scary at first. Until you realize that you’re taking control over the things you can control (which is something I am all for).

Lesson #2: The roles you fill in life do not define you (and are ever-changing).

Back when I left my legal career behind, I struggled with the question “who am I?”. As tends to happen with many lawyers, much of my self-identity was wrapped up in being a lawyer.

I eventually got over that. But soon after dropping Zachary off to college, I realized there was more work to be done in this area.

Up until that point, Zachary’s wins and mistakes said something about me as his mom. Because that is how society often sees it (and frankly, how I saw it).

But now that he is off on his own (without me around), that’s not really the case. At least, not to the same extent.

He is his own person. His wins, losses, mistakes, failures and successes aren’t about me.

It was time for me to let go of making them about me. So that I could allow him to be fully independent.

These lessons hit a lot of emotions. So yeah, they were difficult to learn.

But these are also the types of lessons that make life more interesting and worthwhile. Which means they are worth it.

What changes are you facing right now, Friend, and how might you embrace - not just accept - them?

XO,

Heather

P.S. To learn more about these, and several other lessons I learned (the hard way) in 2024, listen to What Did 2024 Teach Me on the Life & Law Podcast here.