Do what works (for other people).
This is what I was told early in my legal career for how to be successful in law (and I know I’m not the only one who has been told this).
Which might sound like good advice… But it’s not.
Because it leads to:
Mirroring other people’s behaviors.
Taking on the personalities of those above you.
Emulating the strategies + tactics of colleagues.
The problem is that what works for someone else isn’t necessarily the best thing for you.
And it also doesn’t take into account how well it’s really working (maybe something else would work better) or whether the person doing what ‘works’ is happy.
Like most lawyers, I was a rule follower.
So, I did what I was told.
And quickly ended up questioning why I ever wanted to be a lawyer (just a few years in).
Thankfully, my husband helped me snap out of it with a quick: “Heather, you have a choice”.
Yeah, I did.
I could set actual boundaries.
I could put my wellbeing first.
And be successful despite that.
I could even build the practice I wanted, with clients I enjoyed working with doing marketing activities I enjoyed.
Whether or not you’re a lawyer, you can do the same thing.
Do work and life your way, Friend.
How?
Redefine success based on your values and how you want your whole life to look and feel.
Next, prioritize input over output because that’s what you can actually control (and what also ensures the best results for you).
And then be YOU, meaning:
Leverage your strengths (and let others take over where you're weak).
Align your goals and decisions around your values (going beyond the definition).
Speak with your voice (about what's important to you).
Not in a place where you can do that?
Make a change.
Yes, that’s hard. But doable.
It’s what I ultimately did (I was in a wrong culture-fit for me, so found a right-fit place that suited me perfectly).
This is your life. Live it your way.
XO,
Heather
P.S. For more about how to live a happier life, listen to my interview with lawyer Scott Oliver on today’s installment of the Life & Law Podcast about the Interrelationship Between Success, Happiness & Being Human.
