We keep talking about it. You keep trying to find it. Yet you never quite get it. What is “it”?
The ever-elusive work life balance.
I’m known for my blunt honesty so let’s rip the band-aid right off…
Work-life balance doesn’t exist (at least not how we tend to think about it).
Box A for work, Box B for life.
What, exactly, is included within the "life" part?
Relationships?
Self-Care?
Community activities?
Hobbies?
Your spiritual side?
That's a lot to fit into one box. But also...
Isn't work part of life? Didn't you choose your profession for a reason? Do you derive purpose from your work?
You're likely a "yes" for most (if not all) of these questions.
When you compartmentalize into 2 boxes, you know what happens?
You feel like you have to prioritize one side over the other. Which almost always means prioritizing work over all else.
After all, it pays the bills. And you feel you must "prove" yourself more at work (colleagues, bosses and clients don't love you like family).
But then you feel guilt because the other stuff is also important.
Compartmentalization like this makes everything suffer: your health, your relationships and your work too.
Here's how it plays out in real-life, Friend...
You promise to be home for dinner yet don’t make it - again - because you're pulled into a last-minute client meeting you couldn't possibly say no to.
Once home, your partner makes a not-so-subtle remark about missing you for dinner, and you retaliate by instigating a fight over unfolded laundry.
As your 12-year old tells you about their day, you can't focus. They storm off complaining you're never there for them.
To cope, you binge mindlessly on the latest Apple series while grabbing a drink (or three) to wind down.
Which takes your mind off things for a few minutes. Until the guilt comes crashing down for not spending more time with your child and your partner (or doing something good for your own health).
The next morning, you can't stop worrying about all that played out the night before.
You're unfocused.
And exhausted.
Your work is sloppy.
And so, you agree to take on a new project you have zero time for because at least you're being a good team player (and perhaps it makes up for the sloppy work performance).
You're (barely) tolerating your own life.
That’s why everything I offer is designed to help you thrive as a WHOLE person living a WHOLE, integrated life.
It's also why I don’t believe in the work-life-balance juggling act (and tackled this issue early on in my podcast here).
Stop focusing on trying to balance two sides of a ledger (that don’t exist). Instead, start focusing on what brings you energy.
And for goodness sake, define success properly. Focus on your input (i.e., your effort and decision-making process), not your achievements.
Not only will you be more successful; you'll feel good about it too.
XO,
Heather
P.S. I'm not above begging, Friend. Which is why I'm asking you to please fill out my quick survey to let me know how I can better serve you here. This is your last chance to do so and register to win a free coaching hour with me.
Already filled it out? Thank you.
