To be successful long term, you’re going to have to fill your cup first.
Doesn’t matter what exactly you want to be successful doing.
Love, work, entrepreneurship, writing that book, losing 100 lbs.
Basically any accomplishment worth having requires that you nurture, honor and focus on yourself first.
And, you’ve most likely been conditioned to do the opposite.
Most people learn to worry about everyone first and settle for whatever crumbs are leftover after that.
In fact, putting a lover first has a particular kind of pride behind it.
It’s that whole “I would do anything for love” idea (thanks Meatloaf for getting that song stuck in my head this morning).
The fact that you’re TRYING super hard to get someone’s attention is usually NOT why they fall in love with you.
What people don’t realize is that there is neediness buried in extreme self sacrifice.
It’s heavy.
And it drives people away.
That’s why you’re better off making 100% certain that you focus on meeting your own needs first, then letting other people give to you when they want to.
Because no one owes you anything.
No one.
Not even your lover.
And if you treat them like they do, you’ll eventually kill the relationship.
Not because you’re not entitled to wants and desires of your own.
But because need and obligation kill romantic love.
Which... I imagine is the exact opposite effect you’re trying for if you’re reading this.
So, like they say during the emergency instructions during a flight-- please make sure you put on your own oxygen mask first.
Put together a list of non-negotiable “you” requirements that you follow through with no matter what.
Then share the rest of your love with your loved ones. It’s enough.
Talk soon,
Elizabeth
P.S. Whenever you're ready, here are several ways I can help you nurture your relationships:
Get 1:1 Coaching with me. Get an actual plan for saving your relationship, directly from experience of what works and what next steps you should take for your individual situation.
The Love Magnet Meditation. Get my best 11 minute brain hack to magnetize the energy of love and attract more of it.
