| Hey Friend, its your coach, Katya!
Does reading dating/relationship advice make you feel pressure in your chest?
...OR maybe you don't read any of that stuff but you have friends and family giving you contrasting opinions on what you "should" be doing or who you should or shouldn't be dating.
Is the desire to have a bunch of knowledge in your love life crippling you?
Do you feel like you have to “do it all right”?
Many of my readers also read a ton of other blogs, podcasts, buy products that have tips and techniques and steps that you have to follow.
….And that’s all fine and well. Many of it is “on point” and very useful.
But if you’re finding that you’re paralyzed by consuming tons of information.
If you’re finding that its putting more pressure on a budding relationship….
Or adding pressure to your already packed life…
Then don’t do it!
Many of us struggle with perfectionism.
Many of the men who I work with feel like they need to be perfect with women.
...and it’s not just their idea! Cultural norms, upbringing, and the communities men are a part of all play a role in adding to this “invisible” pressure.
Men have to entertain her.
They have to make her laugh.
They have to be witty, clever and quick.
They have to be intelligent.
They can’t be too clingy.
Can’t be too distant.
They have to text… but can’t text too much.
They have to be successful in their career and make enough money.
They have to be masculine but can’t be machismo.
They have to be assertive…. But not too much.
They have to perform in the bedroom.
They must provide and protect…. But at all cost need to avoid being domineering.
For a very few percentage of men these things come naturally.
For the rest its entirely overwhelming and confusing.
So, today what I want to leave you with is this….
You have to be/do absolutely nothing.
You are perfect.
And you are perfectly imperfect.
Take the pressure of yourself to perform.
You don’t have to change anything.
Breathe.
Relax.
And maybe just maybe once you feel this freedom in your body, heart and mind.
Maybe then you can get present to the way YOU desire to grow as a man and human.
But do it for you! Don’t do it for anyone else.
with gratitude,
Katya |
